Monday, July 21, 2008

Fear, Self Doubt and Frustration

While I created this blog to chronicle my journey to become a published writer, there are some thoughts and feelings that are incredibly personal and difficult to share. We all experience some fear and self doubt. Is my work really good enough to be published? Absolutely, but maybe a particular piece needs a major rewrite before it will be accepted. We all experience some frustrations with the length of the process. How long should I continue trying if I get rejection after rejection, month after month? As long as it takes to make your dream happen!! (With the last sentence typed, I'm reminded of Natalie's post about Word correcting her writing even when she typed it incorrectly on purpose.)

Because writing isn't my only job right now, I find it difficult to have enough quiet, uninterrupted time to clear my mind and focus on composing a witty, fun, or informative post. It's even more difficult to find enough time to research and write an article for submission. Blog posts are easy enough to edit if I find an error after the fact, but an error found after submitting work to an editor/publisher can mean sudden death for that piece.

I am somewhat frustrated and even irritated right now. I've wanted to do this for so long. I would love more than just about anything to be able to turn my current business over to someone else so I can dedicate 8-10 hours a day to writing. The bill collectors would not like that very much. For now, I will have to work harder to find a balance between my life as a single mother of three, running a business from home, and pursuing the third love of my life- writing. (In case you're wondering, God ranks #1 and my children are #2- second only because without God I would not have been blessed with the three most amazing children in the world!)


Natalie said...

I feel you, girl! The doubt is like a disease. I get it every other month or so. I'm going through a good bout of it myself right now.

Hang in there. It'll pass.

Never Settle said...

Thanks for the encouragement. Seems with all the medical research and drugs out there that someone would find a cure for such a disease as doubt. :) Our society would be a lot more positive and productive.

Hmmm. Perhaps it's an evolutionary sifter, keeping out those who don't have the grit to stick it out.

I always liked grits.

One Maid A' Milking said...

That's excuse for not making a better go at professional writing has always been time. Children, working from home, and a host of other obligations have always come first.

But that doesn't mean shouldn't also be on the priority list.

Thanks for your post....I'll be dusting something off tonight for submission!

Never Settle said...

One Maid a' Milking,
You're welcome and if you find that magic formula for squeezing a little more time out of your day (since it sounds like yours might be very similar to mine), you let me know!!

Now get busy dusting! :o)

Renee Collins said...

Yep, I feel the exact same things as you. Fear, self doubt, and frustration, you could pretty much call those the three deadly plauges of writers. We all feel them sometimes.

I like your blog! Thanks for popping in on mine. I thought Kiersten and Natalie were the only two people who even knew it existed. :)

Keep writing, I know I will, and we can all be here to support each other. Isn't Blogger great?

Never Settle said...

I saw that you had commented on Natalie's blog, so I thought I'd see who you were. Next thing I know I'm reading your last ten or so posts and all the comments that go along with them!

And yes, blogger is great. It is my (almost) daily writing exercise and a good way to connect with others experiencing the same writing-related issues.

Thank you. I appreciate you stopping by and saying such nice and encouraging things!